It may not appear so, but I can in fact be a timid painter. Patience becomes a common practice, waiting to capture an instant of creative burst. At any given moment, unfinished paintings are scattered about, some eventually rediscovered, and some torn from the frame. I often come across scraps of canvas, cardboard, ripped pages from years ago, when I was only starting to gain momentum as a young artist. At the time these scraps lacked meaning or significance, but coming across them today reminds me of a spark that was full of fight. I struggled immensely to find sense of what I was doing. I am curious, stubborn, and am constantly exploring. In times of discontent, I must remind myself to remain open, and restrain from carving one path too deeply. Remember to feel. So today, on a windy day, holding down these flying pages I deepen the roots from the past and sink my toes in the soil for the future.
One of the foundations that has always resonated strong with me is to create work that is honest. It's a reminder that I must always fall back on, especially in those moments where the momentum simply doesn't flow. It's been 10 years since I've recognized and embraced the style of painting that comes most naturally to me. And since I have allowed my work to flourish and transform onto the path it is today. It's important to note, I did not make a conscious choice of my style of painting, but rather it unfolded from within. There were times it was an inner struggle, trying to change or question what it was exactly I was doing. In the visual arts, there is often the pressure to have justification from the audience, to explain why what you've just put out there is relevant. But in the stages of experimentation and discovery, these explanations may not be so clear. It is at times a strong enough burden to force the artist away from their craft. For every showcased piece I have out there, there is probably double of what I've torn, re-painted or disregarded out of frustration.
The path of creation is not always straight or forward moving. Sometimes it stumbles, sometimes it fails. Sometimes it exceeds your expectations or can emerge from a moment of distraction. Sometimes the breakthroughs get over looked, and sometimes the loses, are praised.
Be attentive. Listen to the instincts and follow the triggers. Our creative inclinations, in whatever form, can be some of the most powerful.